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Still Fighting the Weight Loss War

October 7, 2009 By Leave a Comment

If you’ve been reading my posts, you’re aware that I’ve been struggling with weight loss for the several months. When I say “struggling” I mean I’ve been angry, upset and frustrated to the point of wanting to throw myself on the ground and wail like a 2-year old throwing a fit in the grocery store because his Mom won’t buy an overpriced plastic toy that will likely break 3 seconds after paying for it.

Since June I’ve been up and down between the same 7 pound range, fluctuating between having lost 50 pounds and 57 pounds. It feels like I’ve been standing in between 2 people that have been pushing me back and forth saying, “you’ve lost 57 pounds – good for you” and “not so fast – how about you put some of that weight back on because I’m going to show you just how hard it is to lose a lot of weight.”

It’s not that I’ve been on the “straight and narrow” with Weight Watchers the entire time and can say that I’m fighting a true plateau. Most of the time I know exactly what I did to put those 7 pounds back on (hello cake, brats, gravy and biscuits, chili cheese corn chips, and Coca-Cola).

But the last few weeks I’ve been back to eating healthy and exercising regularly and I’m still fluctuating up and down. Last week I was down 3.6 pounds. This week I gained 2.8 back. Grrrrrrrr!

I won’t give up. I can’t give up. There’s no way I want to go back to where I used to be when I felt like crap all the time and was having a serious flirtation with type II diabetes. Of course that’s not what I was thinking when I weighed in at Weight Watchers yesterday and found I had gained weight. At that point I felt like stomping my foot on the ground and saying “it’s not fair.” Right at that point my mother’s voice started talking inside my head saying “nobody said life was going to be fair.” (I hate that voice!).

Then, later on yesterday I got a call from a friend who told me she just found out she has type II diabetes. I used to be exactly like her, saying how I wanted to lose weight but either doing nothing about it or going on a crash diet for a short time; eating a diet that was 99 percent junk food, fast food, and highly processed food; and never exercising. That’s when I knew I can’t and won’t give up because I don’t want to end up facing serious health issues like she is.

So even though I didn’t have a great week on the scale I’m still fighting the fight. I didn’t drown my sorrows in a huge fatty cheeseburger and fries. Instead I worked out yesterday and today, and have been tracking what I’m eating and staying on program with Weight Watchers.

It’s like Dale Carnegie said, “Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.”

Losing weight is extremely important to me in my world and even though it seems kind of hopeless and like I’ll never get it off, I’m not giving up. I hope someday that #$*% scale will be my friend, just not today.

Filed Under: My Weight Loss Journal, Weight Loss, Weight Watchers

Fighting The Fear To Lose Weight

September 29, 2009 By Leave a Comment

It’s been almost 2 weeks since I’ve posted here and since I wrote about how I realized I was afraid to lose weight.  It’s not that I didn’t want to write, it’s that I didn’t know what to write because I was trying hard to figure out what was going on inside my head (tends to be a crazy, chaotic place).  However, I did manage to muster up the courage to talk to my Weight Watchers leader about my fear of losing weight the same day I wrote the post about my fears although I wasn’t able to find the courage to step on the scale and instead used a weigh-in pass (I’m such a wimpy baby sometimes).

My leader (facilitator) told me what happened to her in one of her first meetings as a leader.  Somebody had asked my leader how she felt after losing weight and obviously my leader said how great it was.  Then another person in the meeting spoke up and said, “don’t expect it to change your life because it didn’t change mine.  I lost 100 pounds but I still have an alcoholic husband who is abusive and won’t work and my life is still a mess.”

That “story”  helped me to realize that I’ve been expecting too much from my weight loss.  Yes, losing the excess weight will make me a healthier, happier, and more confident person but it’s not going to be a magic wand that is going to change my entire life and make all my problems go away.  I’ll still need to deal with those other problems and worries.  And I think that having everything in my life being all “sunshine and puppy dog” happy was what I was thinking weight loss was going to do for me.

It’s sad to realize losing weight won’t change everything; but on the other hand it will change a lot of things in a good way (how I fit into airplane seats, how other people will view me as being a normal weight person versus being a fat person, better health, greater sense of well-being, more confidence, and a huge sense of accomplishment from achieving the weight loss).

Plus, in the end I realized that I had two choices in regards to losing weight.  I can either do it or not do it.  The choice is mine. When I talked to my leader she said to not let Weight Watchers decide what I’m going to weigh.  Before you think I have a horrible leader, hear me out.  She pointed out how I’ve lost over 50 pounds and that maybe I wanted to work on maintaining that weight loss instead of doing the yo-yo up and down with my weight that I’ve been going through for the past few months.  She also said I’m a lot more than a number on the scale.  The number is just that – a number.  It doesn’t make me a bad person.

I think she was using some of her reverse psychology on me, because after pondering our conversation for a few days I realized that I really do want to lose the rest of my excess weight (she’s sneaky but very effective because instead of preaching she says little things to help a person realize on their own what they really want – she’s an awesome Weight Watchers leader!).

So I took a deep breath and stepped back on the scale at Weight Watchers last week and faced it.  I had gained back 7.6 pounds of the 57 I had lost.  Instead of berating myself for gaining weight back I decided to be happy that I didn’t gain it all back like I have dozens of times in the past.

I worked hard to stay within my allotted points this past week along with exercising, drinking lots of water, and eating a bunch of fruits and vegetables every day.

This morning at Weight Watchers the scale showed a 3.6 pound weight loss for a total of 53 pounds!  I’m headed back in the right direction.

Filed Under: My Weight Loss Journal, Weight Loss, Weight Watchers Tagged With: , , ,

Recall of Weight Watchers Hungry Magnets and Figures

August 21, 2009 By 1 Comment

If you’ve attended a Weight Watchers meeting the past several months or have been actually watching the commercials on television and not fast forwarding through them (a DVR makes that so easy), you’ve probably heard about or seen “Hungry”  – a cute little orange guy who tries to get people to go off their diet but serves a reminder to not let “Hungry” get the best of us.

I think it’s a genius marketing campaign by Weight Watchers (although I don’t understand why “Hungry” doesn’t have a mouth), so much so that I bought myself a Hungry magnet for my refrigerator door to remind me to ask myself if I was actually hungry or just bored before I opened the door and perused the food choices inside.

But now my cute little magnet along with the larger stuffed figures are being recalled.

On August 20, the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission and Health Canada, with the cooperation of Weight Watchers International, announced a voluntary and immediate recall of the approximately 445,000 Hungry Figures and Hungry Magnets that been sold in the United States and Canada.

The reason for the recall?  Sewing needles have been found in the stuffing of the Hungry Figures, which poses a puncture hazard to consumers.

People are encouraged to immediately stop using their Hungry Figures and Hungry Magnets and to return them to Weight Watchers where they will receive a full refund or a credit towards the purchase of another product.

For more information read the entire press release from the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission by clicking here or click here to read the press release from Health Canada.

Filed Under: Weight Loss News, Weight Watchers Tagged With: , , , , , ,

I Was Afraid To Weigh In This Week

August 21, 2009 By Leave a Comment

I didn’t weigh in at Weight Watchers this week even though I talked smart about how I was going to “face the ugly truth and get on the scale,” accepting that nobody forced me to overeat.   But, when it came right down to it, I couldn’t go into the meeting and face my leader, even though she is completely non-judgmental.

Why?  Because my warped mind was sure that even though she would be completely supportive out loud, that in her mind she would be thinking “how could you be such a pig that you gained 12 pounds in 3 weeks?”    Yes, 12 pounds.  It’s horrible.  A pound is 3,500 calories which means I ate 42,000 extra calories during those 3 weeks or an average of an extra 2,000 calories a day.  Is it any wonder that I’m fat?  Talk about complete lack of self-control

How do I know I gained 12 pounds?  Even though I couldn’t face the scale at Weight Watchers I got on my scale at home Monday morning when my “skinny” pants felt tight.  That’s when I snapped out of the food induced fog I was under and remembered that I can’t eat anything I want without consequences (it was also when I resolved that I would go to Weight Watchers Tuesday morning, which I then changed to Wednesday evening, which I then changed to Thursday morning, and which then became “not this week”).

I got on the scale again this morning even though I almost never weigh myself at home and was happy to see I’ve lost 6 of those pounds, which is a lot to have lost over the last 4 days but I was really bloated on Monday morning so I knew I had several pounds of water weight hanging around on me.  That’s the good news.  The bad news is that I still have 8 more pounds to lose to get back to where I was a month ago.

It’s pretty depressing but at least I’ve put a stop to the backsliding before I gained back all the weight I lost (plus an extra 5 or 10 pounds just for it to be more upsetting).

Why am I telling you this?  It’s certainly not because I’m proud of what I’ve done.  Part of it is selfish.  I hope that by writing about my struggles and putting them “out there” for everyone to see, that it will help motivate me to finally get all the extra weight off.  The other part is that I’m hoping I can help at least one other person see that even if there are bad days (or bad weeks) of overeating, it doesn’t mean a person should give up.

Yes, I lost the “battle of the bulge” (not funny, but true) over the last several weeks.  But I’m determined to not lose the war I’ve declared on my fat.

I know I have to get my butt back at Weight Watchers next week even though there’s no way I’ll have all that extra weight off.  I’m hoping I can keep my resolve and get there.

Filed Under: Lose Weight Naturally, My Weight Loss Journal, Weight Watchers Tagged With: ,

3 Things I Don’t Love About Weight Watchers

August 5, 2009 By Leave a Comment

I’ve been going to Weight Watchers since September, 2008 and have lost 57 pounds which is almost halfway to my goal.

While there’s lots I love about it, namely that it’s working for me, there’s a couple things I don’t love so much (there’s a downside to everything, right?).

What I hate most about Weight Watchers:

1 – “tracking” (writing down what I eat and assigning “points”
values to it based on calories/fat/fiber and portion size).  It’s a huge pain in the arse!  I absolutely detest tracking!

But I liken it to tracking money spent on a budget. I’m doing that too and hate it just as much as tracking what I eat, but tracking what I spend is helping my financial situation too.

Bottom line: tracking sucks but is worthwhile because it works.


2 – the cost (currently $12 a week or $39.95 for the automatic billing plan).  It’s not cheap but I know it’s a whole lot cheaper than medical bills down the road will be if I don’t lose these many pounds of “pudge.” I wish I could do it own on my own and save the $40 a month I spend but I need the accountability of weighing in every week and definitely need the support from my leader and fellow members.


3 – that all fat calories are the same. Bad fats rack up the points used just as quickly as good fats like olive oil which stinks. This might not seem like a big deal to you but I love salmon and those healthy fats in it mean that a portion of salmon with the same amount of calories as a piece of chicken costs me more points.

Filed Under: Featured, Lose Weight Naturally, My Weight Loss Journal, Weight Loss Articles, Weight Watchers

7 Reasons To Follow Weight Watchers Versus Other Weight Loss Plans

August 4, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Almost everybody seems to have an opinion about which weight loss product or plan works best.

I think my success so far (57 pounds and counting!) is testament to how well it works and here’s 7 top reasons why I’m following it:

1 – it’s working (insert happy dance here).

2 – no food is off limits so I can actually go out to eat if I want or have a bowl of popcorn for dinner if I choose to do so.

3 – there are no pills (which may later turn out to be more dangerous to a person’s health than the extra pounds of blubber).

4 – no dangerous “weight loss surgery.”

5 – no “liquid” meal replacements.

6 – not forced to eat prepackaged meals unless I choose.  (Sorry Nutri-System but those photos I see of your food on television do not look appetizing at all and those photos are meant to show the food in the best possible light! That ice cream looks exactly like frozen ice crystals with about a teaspoon of fat free milk in it – yuck!

7 – lots of support from my leader (called a “facilitator” now but I think that sounds dumb) and from other members at the meetings where no question or concern is too stupid or silly to ask (seriously).

Filed Under: Featured, Lose Weight Naturally, My Weight Loss Journal, Weight Loss Articles, Weight Watchers Tagged With:

Weight Loss Plateaus

June 10, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Weight Loss Plateaus are about the worst thing to deal with and get through when dieting.  They are weight loss hell and a big reason why a lot of people “toss in the towel” on their weight loss efforts.

I’ve been dealing with a plateau for the past month.  The same 2 1/2 pounds has been plaguing me – down, up, down, up…..grrrrr!

I’ve been happy, mad, frustrated, sad, hopeless and completely ticked off.

Last week when I weighed in at Weight Watchers I let my frustrations pour out to my leader (yes, I know I’m supposed to call her a facilitator now but I think it sounds stupid).  She calmly listened and then suggested I quit trying to lose for a few weeks and instead try to maintain since my emotions were all over the place ever since I reached 50 pounds.

It made sense even though I resisted for a couple of minutes.  My emotions have been all over the place.  I was ecstatic when I got my 50 pound reward.  I felt as skinny as Twiggy!  Then I got depressed when I realized that I wasn’t even halfway to my goal (I want to lose 120 pounds). Maybe I did need a break.  So the next day I added a few points to my daily allowance just like anyone who was going on maintenance would…..and then…..I proceeded to pig out!

I decided since I was going to “maintain” that it would okay to drink a regular Pepsi (the full octane stuff with something like 15 teaspoons of sugar in it).  The first Pepsi was so good I decided to have a second..then a third, fourth, and fifth.  While in the middle of my Pepsi binge I got hungry for chips and found a half bag of stale Chili Cheese Corn Chips in my pantry so I ate (inhaled) all of them even though they were more chewy than crunchy.

Then, since I had blown the day anyway I decided to take a trip to McDonalds for a Big Mac and fries….can’t really tell you why – by then I was in a food induced haze and couldn’t stop myself from shoving my mouth full of fatty, high calorie food.

After my McDonalds binge I felt sick.  What a surprise, right?

A bike ride seemed like the right thing to do in an effort to burn off a few of the junk food calories I had just consumed.

The bike ride was hell.  Even though I had consumed enough calories and sugar to satisfy a small elephant I could barely muster up enough energy to get through my normal 10 mile bike ride.  Plus, the farther I got into my ride the sicker I felt.  I was gassy from all the soda and had to fight the urge to jump off my bike and “hurl” into the bushes.

Then and there I vowed to remember how eating that junk made me feel.

The next day, last Thursday, I got up and decided to get back on track with Weight Watchers.  I ate healthy the rest of the Weight Watchers week (I weigh in on Tuesday mornings so my “Weight Watchers” week is Tuesday through Monday), exercised, and drank a lot of water.  Plus I didn’t let myself get on the scale at home (no need to take the risk of further depressing myself).

At weigh in yesterday I was down 4 pounds!

My leader thinks my binge shocked my system all to heck.  She cautioned that I shouldn’t do the binge every week but she reminded me how she often tells people during our meetings to go ahead and use all their extra weekly points in one day when their weight loss is at a standstill in order to get their metabolism burning up calories again.  The problem is that most people resist that suggestion and are too horrified to even consider it cuz how can temporarily eating more mean losing weight?

It does work.   Of course, it doesn’t mean a person should eat the junk I did.  Healther eating is a better idea.

I’m officially down 55 pounds and have now made it through several plateaus.

What have I learned?

For me, the best way to get through those plateaus and start getting the weight off again is to do something different – to shake things up and kind of confuse my body.  During one I started drinking lots more water; then I upped my exercise; then I significantly upped my fruits and veggies; then I changed my exercise routine.  They all worked and got me through plateaus in two or three weeks.

The problem was that when I hit this plateau I didn’t know what to do differently.  I was drinking lots of water, eating lots of fruits and veggies, and had an exercise routine that I could change some – but didn’t see a lot of room for change (mostly because the weather is finally nice – no snow – and I’m working hard to get my “butt” conditioned for long bike rides).

I was so close to giving up but I stuck with it (such a change from the last 150 times I tried to lose weight – I was always giving up.  I just may finally have my head screwed on right).

The thing that helped me the most was continuing to go to Weight Watchers and not skipping a meeting or avoiding weigh in.  Being in that meeting room with other people who understand how difficult it is to get those pounds off and having an understanding leader made the difference for me.

Now it’s onward and forward for me…..working on losing that weight one day (and sometimes “one minute”) at a time.

Filed Under: Lose Weight Naturally, Weight Loss Plateaus, Weight Watchers Tagged With: , ,
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